Today I realized that the six emotions called kama, krodha, moha, madha, lobha, and ahamkara are the cause for all the problems. They are very much related to love. You'll be able to show love only when you understand that these emotions play with not just you but with any being. You can get rid of these bad emotions only through practice and with the help of yoga. "This" is a very interesting article on these emotions. In the end, it says that only when we are aware of these emotions, we can do something in life. It is a very good practice to take a few minutes in a day and think of how you got affected by these emotions and how can you improve yourself.
Back to the topic of love, you need to understand that others are just like you and often get affected by these bad emotions. Only then you'll be able to love them. Here are few examples from my life:
1. A friend whom I helped many times is about to get his degree. And he doesn't need any help from me now. Now when I wish him casually, he would not reply and instead shouts at me saying why I am talking to him. He is one of those who thinks that life is just to marry, enjoy and leave. Since he is going to get his degree, his next need is to get a girl. He doesn't care about anything else. He is completely played by these bad emotions. I need to understand it and love him. I should not get hurt. There are many people who think that life is over after getting a degree and marriage. I don't think, now a days, anybody thinks of "moksha", "understanding life and god", etc. as their goals. I am an old fashioned person, so I believe that my goal in life is to understand life and achieve "moksha".
2. There is a person who was a very good friend, whom I cared a lot and helped a lot. And it happened like the story of kings in the history, where a king brings his child with great care and love, but the boy thinks "Let me put my father behind the bars, I can become the king" and puts his father in jail. It is ahamkara, which is the cause of the problem. Similarly that person, who was a very good friend, forgot everything I did and blamed me for spoiling her life. And she forced me to break friendship and leave. So I did what she wanted.
2. God has given me a brother and sister. Both of them are very alike. They get angry and frustrated easily. My sister gets frustrated by small small things. And my brother gets angry easily if I say something against him. Though I tell them not be angry, they quickly forget. Nevertheless, they love me very much and I love them too. Therefore I don't mind if they are angry or shout at me, I just warn them that they should bear things and not get angry quickly. I can bear them, but tomorrow they may stay with somebody who does not have so much love and patience. Then it will be a problem.
The art of loving is to adjust ourselves as much as possible and not to pain others. It doesn't mean that you should leave Dharma. One should always stick to his/her Dharma. I am a student and my Dharma is to study well. I can't forget it and enjoy all the time giving treats and parties, even though it may make many happy. Love is not to impress others. It is to understand their problems and feel for it. If you can do something for the other, good. But if you can't, you should bear the pain. For example, when I go out of my institute, I see so many child beggars. Seeing them my heart melts like ice, and I start giving whatever I can. But still it doesn't make me happy. Imagine how many such people will be there in our country. In my current state, I can't do anything but bear that I am incapable. Even the ten rupee note I give to a child may not make him happy. Most likely he will misuse it. Therefore we should understand that all we can do is love them, and try to help them. We may not know whether the help is really helpful or not. The only little fruitful help I do for the poor is praying god, requesting him to help them. That's all I can do, and I am doing it.
I am a big fan of Lord Rama Chandra, who has a very loving heart. Words are not sufficient to describe him. The best ones which could describe him barely are some beautiful songs. One among them, which I found recently, is mAmava paTTabhirAma (Click here for lyrics). The song describes the pattabhisheka of Rama, after returning to Ayodhya after aranyavasa. The song is just marvelous.
